Roles and Goals

"Don't tell me your priorities; show me your calendar. It will tell me your priorities." That was a pretty harsh thing to hear from a mentor when I was 21 years old. The next 10 minutes were some of the most important bits of counsel I've ever received.
What one aspires to extract from life can often be simplified into roles and goals. The only way I know how to really share this lesson is from a very personal perspective. My intent is not to illustrate my own roles and goals, rather to provide a framework that I hope you customize and make your own.
Four steps that will change your life if you let them:
  1. Isolate the various roles you fill. As an example, the roles I have identified for my life are: Christian, Husband, Father, Friend, Business Leader, Citizen, and Investor.
  2. Identify a key person for each role. In my role as husband, for example, my wife Andrea is the key person associated with that role.
  3. Set a goal to for each role. The most succinct way I've found to do this is to ask what the key person would say about you that would indicate success. In my example above, I want Andrea to be able to say that I enrich her life immeasurably.
  4. Do something every week to make progress on each role. Start a weekly planning session with yourself. Each Sunday evening I sit down with my roles and goals in front of me. I re-read my personal mission and vision statements, put myself 20 years in the future, and try to counsel myself on how to spend my time in the coming week. Looking at each role, key person, and goal, I ask myself, "what am I going to do this week to make sure I nail this one?" It's amazing how obvious the answers are if you simply ask the questions in the order of priority in your life.
In the example I've used to illustrate my role as a spouse, I've lost track of the weeks that have crept up on me without any time simply dedicated to being with my wife without any other distractions (quality time is one of her love languages). And as unromantic as it sounds, it's my weekly planning session that reminds me to cancel that evening business obligation and go on a stroll with Andrea. My future self will smile at the acknowledgement that my calendar now reflects my priorities much more accurately.
I challenge you to put steps 1-3 on paper. And to do step 4 for three weeks in a row. Let me know how it goes.
Peter Ting

Director Of Business Development, APAC at Dura Chemicals, Inc

8y

Thank you for your article and advise. It is definitely changing the priorities in my calendar moving forward!

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Hayati TASTAN, PhD in GIS

Deputy Director General of NSDI (Coğrafi Bilgi Sistemleri Genel Müdür Yardımcısı)

9y

So is life, very simple...

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Roli Saxena

CEO & Board Member | ex-LinkedIn and Brex

9y

Great article Wade! Work/ Lif.e balance does not exist but what exists is work- life choices and I like the framework to implement your choices

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Kartik Kulkarni

Digital Delivery Partner, Banking and Financial Services | Senior Consultant | Change Agent | Enterprise Agile Coach

9y

Quick , Simple but very effective way ... thanks for sharing...

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